30 July 2008

Satanism

My research into the illuminati has brought me to the doorstep of Satanism. That term doesn't quite describe what Satan they worship as there are many devils not to be confused with the Satan of the Freemason's.

They worship Baphomet, the hermaphrodite goat headed, female torso with wings of a bat and goat legs. Evidently the Freemason's devote architecture to this creature, a sexual union of male and female. The male is the phallus. Phallus comes from the greek word phalos that means "white" or "bright". Which is the sun. Light is what illuminates all that we can sense through our eyes. Hence the all seeing eye. If the Freemason's can control what you see, they control your mind.

Anyways, all this Satanic stuff of Freemasonry comes from ancient religions of Egypt and Babylon. They still worship the Egyptian god Ra. Thats why the Pyramid with the all seeing eye appears on the back of the dollar bill. It comes from the Freemason's and their ties to ancient Egypt. I guess thats also why that culture is one that we are supposed to be fascinated with. Its know wonder the ancient Egyptian culture is marketed like the essential ancient history all people should know about.

As with all things, I think you should do a little bit of research yourself into this. I'm already getting critisized about thinking about Satanism. People assume its nuts, even more nuts than aliens and reptilians. Just to let you know, I'm serious about this new research I'm doing. Research has never taken on a magnitude like this in my art process. This is heavy, indepth, complex material that must also be ordered and synthesized into an original work of art for people to be able to process the information and question the reality of phenomenon.

28 July 2008

I'll never Commit Suicide

Just in case in the news you hear that Albert Alvarez commited suicide you should question that because I'm saying here publicly that I would never do that. I don't see the honor in it. Commiting suicide is throwing the towel in, failure is not an option.

The reason I'm saying this is cuz I've heard that agents like to murder people with political view points and make it look like a suicide, such as the DC Madam case. Also, people like Alex Jones says he gets death threats by SS agents. So, I'm just saying this as a precaution, I would never do something stupid. My weapons are my pens and paintbrushes.

I seen movies and learned about psychotic people like Ted Bundy, I'm not like that. Learn about how psycho that person is, and understand that I'm not capable of atrocities like that, I have a conscience. I would feel horrible for hurting somebody. Ted Bundy was a necrophilliac that bludgeoned defenseless women. Thats pretty horrific.

Oh yeah, I don't see myself as a total outsider. But yes, my point of view is outside the normal consensus of what reality is, so yes I would consider myself an outsider in that respect. I am a normal introverted person, that likes to socialize because I do spend 90% of my time ALONE! So I do feel distant from social scenes, but I don't think its because I am self pittying. On the contrary, I feel like I don't want to be inappropriate, there is a time and place to drop a bomb on you. Like I said, we probably don't see I to eye on things, and it makes me sad cuz this is the world I have to deal with, but in no way am I opposed to friends and getting along with people, no matter their political dispositions.

I do got a lot of mental baggage with all the information I have to deal with and sort out in order to produce my art. Some days my mind is heavily saturated with information, and its not something I can bounce off of you unless you know about satanic occultists and how they play out in freemasonry and their monuments and rituals.

Thats the crazy shit I'm dealing with. Its far out there. This is my current mind set. I'm filling my mind and making new connections and trying to map out their master plan. Give me a fucking break people, I'm trying to be cool but some crazy fucks out there are fucking with our minds.

22 July 2008

Journeyman, Mystic Quest to Truth

First Case
"Bright Green Grass"


I sort of cringe when people use psychedelic mushrooms, or shrooms as I'll refer to them from here on out, for recreational purposes. I first learned about shrooms freshman year of college when I saw people taking these fungi rotted shrooms just for fun. I knew the people and noticed that they're pupils got dilated, and they would laugh and giggle, have a gidddy time.

I was opposed to this substance. I didn't know a thing about them, I considered them a hard drug like heroin and cocaine. I saw my friends do them so my opinions about the stuff started to change. They didn't flop over dead, they didn't vomit for hours, they just seemed normal but had a silly loose pep in their step. Soon I became open to trying this drug out.

So my friends let me take a little bit with them one night. It was a big group of us a mixture of guys and girls. I thought this was going to be a bonding experience, so I was comfortable with this situation, these were people I wanted to be friends with, and some still our my good friends.

This was a mild trip. A good one to get me to want to try them again. The major revelations I had with this trip was increases in perceptual senses. No hallucinating, I just saw reality more objectively, I noticed the proportions of people to the architecture in the environment, and noticed that the colors were more saturated, the grass was bright green.
Case Two
Good Trip, Bad Trip

The scenario for this experience was one that led to me and my friend who had taken the shrooms with have a mental breakdown. From this experience I learned to be in a comfortable setting, not have any worries, or social obligations.

I got caught up in the moment, and flipped out on my friend. Its funny now, but in the heat of the moment, I was seriously in a state of panic. It was the last day we could be in the our dorm rooms, we needed to be out the next morning by 7am or 8am-early. Well, my friend had a whole lot of packing still to go, we are supposed to take a taxi together to the airport in the morning. He had some shrooms to get rid of, so we had to take them. The situation got to me, and I saw this huge mess my friend needed to pack, he didn't have enough suitcase space for everything, so he was going to try to stuff everything into a box or something. But we were messed up so bad on shrooms, that we couldn't organize ourselves and were sort of infeable.

I left the room and said I was going to take a shower cuz thats all I needed to do for my plain traveling. I had the most amazing shower of my life. I was no longer in a panic, but started to feel cleansed of those emotions in the shower, like a baptism. The water felt good, I saw it cascading and the sound of the water was a phonic delight. I felt loose and comfortable in my body, my clothers draped over my body perfectly, and I was fascinated by the sound of buttoning my shirt up.

So this trip went from a bad trip to a good trip. Some how my friend got his shit together, and we were both on the same page, feeling great, slapping hi fives and new what was up. I noticed the trees looked like dragons, and nature seemed intelligent and alive, almost as if I had never noticed it before. I was even still intoxicated at the airport, I was standing waiting for my bags to get xrayed and I noticed all the airline information warping. The terminals seemed long and receded into deep space, like a vanishing point on a horizon.

Case Three
Big Bang

So this is the experience that changed my life. Here are some of the details; this was an impromptu trip. I was pretty confident with my shrooming experiences. So I had no qualms about tripping. The shrooms were beautiful. Pearly white, knarly stems with spots that were dark rich blue, like ink dropped on tissue paper. Also, scattered on the stems, were gold flakes, like gold leaf. I couldn't believe it and had not much time to apprecaite their aesthetic beauty as they were consumed quickly. I was at my best friends apartment. I lived a walk down the hill. So I was comfortable at this place.

After ingesting the shrooms, I was hanging with my friend in his room while he worked on a photo project and was operating a matte cutter. His room was small and sqaurish. On the walls were his drawings that he would entertain me with, rather enjoyable, humorous drawings. But this time they started to look scary. They peeled off the wall like spirits.

I started to feel sick, I started to regret eating the mushrooms. In an effort to bring back the positive feelings of tripping I asked if I could use his shower. He said yeah, but I didn't know how to operate the shower-that felt like a daunting task, one I was not capable of achieving in my current whacked out mind.

I wanted to feel comfotable. I wanted to live, not die. I my friend if I could lay down on his bed, and for him to check on me to make sure I would be alright.

I curled up in a feetle position under a blanket, alone. Worried that I was going to die. I thought about the police finding my dead body, and how pathetic it was that I died on shrooms. I thought about how sad my family would be that I died like this. All this was in my mind, with my eyes closed I started to lose track of time. My mind was abosorbed in death. I didn't realize during the whole experience that I was hallucinating, until after the experience.

Those feelings of death started to go away. I was convinced that I was dead, but this wasn't a bad thing at all. I was over joyed that I was dead. I realized there is only one conciousness. That life and death are equal. That this consciousness works no matter what. That we are fortunate beings to live for how ever long we do. I didn't want people to cry for me. I wanted to come back from the dead and tell people that everything is okay. That I was very happy to be alive, and dead. It was the same thing.

By attaining this knowledge, I felt as though I had been released from my fear of death. What actually died was my ego. I had a ego death. I felt no fear because I wasn't self conscious. I didn't worry about my fears, I was at peace with my being. I felt great, and accepted as a fortunate part of the structure of life.

As I lay there, I started to see sparking rivers of ultra violets, images of figures would drift and surface bending the streams of light and color, the figures were in anguish, and looked exactly like Picasso's Guernica painting but in vivid colors. I saw my grandparents in the center of my vision, smiling, welcoming me into the light. I felt connected to all life, all my ancestory, and realized the beauty of life, reproduction and pride and honor, and compassion. I never knew that feeling before. I never felt love the I was feeling it. I felt like I was in my mothers womb, safe, nurtured, beyond knowing who I am, as a personality, this great force loved me and cared for me deeply and wanted me to live. This force encouraged me to be confident in my purpose in life.

This is where I got my sense of purpose in life. I was reasured by the loving force that is life that I am "it". "You are it Albert, you are it" was this soft voice that was not mine. You know how you have a voice inside your head that you know is your self, well this voice was speaking to me that was not mine. For the first time, I felt this powerful force of love and compassion eminating from my heart. I felt warm. I saw warm light, oranges and yellows. I felt as though I was being cradled, protected.
I never felt so much care and compassion. The feeling of this was the ultimate wisdom that would bring peace and happiness to every persons being. This great wisdom is inside everybody. This was not just for me, but for everybody. This great wisdom knows who you are because you are it. This is your fullest potential, and this is what your life force wants you to utilize. Your great fortunate being must carry out the life force you have been born into.
This life force was vast and driven infinately inward, through all the universe and beyond was this well spring of compassion, the meaning of life is to continue sharing this life force. The force wants life to happen. The life force loves all its beings. The force pushes, or permeates in everything that exists. This is the heart and soul of all life. I would call this the mother. There is no doubt that this force was feminine. This was my mother, this is the mother of all mothers. She is what I would call God, but even that doesn't do her justice. She is a compassionate, inner life force of all things.
My journey through this led me to a spinning blue buddha. Having no prior knowledge of Buddhism at the time, a spinning, 2 dimensional meditating Buddha colored in ultra violets, passed from the left of my vision to the right making several revolutions till his exit.

I was intrigued as to why I saw a Buddha, from this point on is when I started to research this religion, and this is when I started to discover that many of the revelations and philosophies I was experiencing coincided with what the Buddha taught, so this gave me evidence that what the Buddha taught, is the greatest, knoweldge of the self that exists for humans.

Funny thing about all this, at the end of my revelations, two, 2d creatures on opposite sides of my vision were spitting a little orb of light back and forth at each other, similar to the way the game Pong functions,

Only difference was that the funny monsters would catch the orb in their chomper like mouths and spit it back. I laughed and thought to myself, so what does this have to do with all the great things I just saw, is it a joke? Beyond everything is laughter I reckon.

I awoke to see the people I was supposed to be tripping with in the room with me. I was deleriosly happy. I proclaimed I just found out what everybody wants to know. Yet there was no way of telling people, it was more of a self experience. I was so happy. I woke up hallucinating spirals of color like I was wearing hallucination sun glasses. There was a filter of swirling rainbows in my vision. I felt as though there was no difference between sleeping and being awake. I could be asleep and be in the same consciousness as when I am alert and awake. Like I could pass through levels of consciousness with ease.

The rest of the trip was just being amazed by what I had experienced. I was still tripping hard and was able to manipulate my vision. I remember looking at a painting a friend of mine had done, and being able with my mind to animate it.

The revelation experience from the time I passed out, to the time I awoke was three hours. I was absorbed completly by this experience for 3 hours. Curled up in a ball, hallucinating out the wazoo for 3 hours, eyes closed shut.

21 July 2008

Showdown


I'm calling this one Showdown, for now, maybe forever. Sorry about the crude, obnoxious watermark. I don't mean to be a shrewd dick with that, idk how to watermark politely yet. everything has got to be politically correct now a days, you don't know how much i want to be using obscenities right now, but i'm refraining as best i could from unleashing a whirlwind, tirade of gangsterism dirt talk.

wwwwwwwwwwwaaaaaaa, god damn fuck, there you happy now cock squeezer???
chameleon lemon headed pussy terrorist

i'm printing these bitches out but they suck down so much ink shit is back firing on me, they look tight though, vivid and pretty, i can't get the borders right though, i keep cropping the edges off.
well, this is my new approach to art. thats right folks, i'm going digital. its the shit. let me tell you why. you see, digital paints is like having the best of both worlds when it comes to paints, like oil and acrylic. its like having the best paints, the best mediums, the best paint brushes.
i spent 3-4 hours on each head, fucking scum terrorists, i hate you with all my heart! i think i still get the my point across.
why would some low IQ, rag wearing, bare foot cave men from a third world country hate america so much that they had to fly airplanes into buildings? why haven't they struck again? it must be because our government stepped up and took our rights away, warrantless wire tapping, spying on citizens, restricting free speech, press, threatening you with jail time and tazers if you step out of line sheeple.
man, i am more afraid of my own government than i am of some senior citizens and afghan kids with HIGH powered assualt rifles in afghanistan. can you imagine some frail old man trying to shoot one of those things? this is ridiculous.
and its pathetic that we are tied down spread eagle while our psychotic ted bundy loving government fucks us heinously, "any thing for you ted, i love you, i love you government."
instead of dreaming about sucking on britney spears tits all day, we should be trying to realize that we been had, we are being taken on a wild ride of death, never has life been this deadly, diabetes, cancers, its the plague as alex jones said it the other day. when you think about it, this is like the plague, only its a soft kill. i think we are close to a major awakening. people are starting to wake up thankfully. i mean, for fucks sake, what do you think is going on here? natural selection? evolution? this ain't right. for me its a matter of wisdom. wisdom wisdom wisdom wisdom, this world don't make sense. its against wisdom. nobody talks about wisdom. people argue about whose god is right, or demi god politician is right, but when you think of wisdom no body knows anything about good wisdom, not like righty tighty lefty loosey, but some buddha wisdom, some tao teh ching knowledge. some zen nirvana insight. thats some good shit. it flys in the face of the bs going on here.
idk, this is horrible, its real. everyday you are effected by tyranny. reading this is just a moment of a point of view that is outside the general reality.

18 July 2008

Political Views

All I know is I live in the United States of America. It was founded on a Constitution and Bill of Rights. Those rights seem self explanatory. So why are there all these restrictions on guns? Why restrictions on free speech? Why can't you question these sort of things without getting ostracized?
I don't get it. People say I'm way off the mark, but these people have small minds. There is a lot of people talking and listening about what the hell is really going on here, fascism, scientific dictatorship, problems with medical science, the economy. These seem like serious issues.
Whatever the case may be, I feel ostracized. It sucks cuz I'm just trying to question reality. People need to question reality, I know that's a popular term, so do it, to a full ranging extent. Because if you do question reality, authority you will find there is a point where the authorities won't give you an answer, and say that you're crazy for thinking so hard about something. They don't want you to think! That's a son of bitch life to live, stay silent, stay devoid of voice, paint abstractly, make silly vapid scribbles. Don't give a fuck. Fuck the world. LA LA LAlala LA LA LA LAH LAH

17 July 2008

Don't FUCK With Me

Skull and Bones, CIA all the bullshit secrets. I don't get hung up on fears about some SWAT team storming me and saying I'm a terrorist. That's impossible for me. Am I blind? Should I think twice about what I say, especially when it comes to political issues? No, if you pay attention to the stuff I do. Some people are scared shaking in their boots when it comes to shit that pertains to questioning conventional reality.
Conventional reality is today's modern mind set. We accept authority by the experts at delivering to you information. We percieve this delivery and presentation as truth, the almighty word of God almost. Its religious fervor to believe in something whole heartedly. Not a bad thing. This is the tricky part in all this, is that so much seems good and distictly evil. We must come to understand that as positives and negatives.
I think in order to understand postives and negatives is to approach the situation by qusetioning. Deductive reasoning. Normally you are educated and brought to a level of understanding by applications of your teaching and life experience. We are now a days mostly brought up by our education systems. We have a selective, socialist view.
The reason the Constiution, Bill of Rights is so important to civilization is because it provides a outline for a self explanatory set of rules that are fair and promote the upholding of peace and defense of it. There should always be peace and harmony within this constitution but rebellion only would arise if the either a negative force was trying to disrupt the order of law set forth by the bill of rights, or if one already had gotten hold of the laws and perverted the view of them, similar to what we have now, than yeah, that is a call for upheavel.
Whatever, this world is complex I know, full of secrets and occult fantasies, but that doesn't mean I can't talk about them. What is they are fuling the world. Do you like getting screwed over? You got to bring this shit to light. Realize what America is supposed to be about and not what 9/11 made this in to.
Well, I heard people can't address the issues in my art. I personally don't have problems with peoples reactions. But people try and tell me to cool it, or whatever, but I must be looking at some ghosts or imaginary people, but even than thats cool to right, a wild imagination? so please don't tell me to watch what i say. I'm a nice person, I'm aware of the CIA and FBI and all that terrorists watch shit, but fuck all that. Why would any one want to sabatoge my carreer for some viewpoints I have? I here of successful people that deal in this market of thought. Don't tell me I can't do something because it doesn't acquiese to the general consensus of narrow minded beings right now. I'm confident in my views, smart evil geniuses ruling the planet in hiding, yet in plainview with occultish junk makes sense to me. You should think about it too. A lot of fucked up shit is going on, this country is slipping far out of reach, the time to react is now, not scoff, and frolick to Pan's flute.

08 July 2008

LAST STAND





This piece is done in response to nationality. Being raised in San Antonio, TX, I experienced a culture that is a mixture of third world goat farm Mexico ranchero to a white man's racial superiority segregation. I naturally fell into the Mexican-American heritage.
Although I never thought of myself growing up as Mexican or foreign to the Pledge of Allegiance to the United States of America, I have started to notice sub cultures in my environment. Its a combination of different prides. One a pride in the Mexican-Catholic heritage being the superior to the white mans. And the supposed racial white man's America, that fought the World Wars, and dominates the planet with superior intelligence, strength, talent and beauty.
By growing up in a racist atmosphere I developed a split in my loyalties. Maybe I'm more Mexican than American?Maybe its a good thing I'm a great artist with this skin color, or minority status. Maybe this will show that Mexican race should be respected. Maybe American policy to foreigners is too harsh, and I should relish in the influx of immigration. Hell yeah, let the borders open up. Take back Texas, this land used to be Mexico anyway, fuck America.
Seriously, I thought those feelings. I thought that America was evil and that Mexico would be taken over by Mexican's once again. My philosophy at the time was this is the planet earth, who should say that there is a border between countries, that wrong, I'm opposed to borders.
I thought these things because of propaganda that said that Latino's are the highest growing minority in the USA. That these people are have been treated like shit by the white man and it's time for some get back-revenge.
Boy, have my view points changed. My foreign policy does not include sympathy for third world nations right now, as I'm starting to see that America is turning into a fascist third world country. At least in a third world country the people there rise up and revolt. Here, American's are loving being put in their place.
I'm more concerned now with preserving America and its Constitution. I was under globalist mind control when I was thinking those thoughts. I now see that America should preserve its nationality. We must see beyond the racist mentality being bred within these borders.
I see that there is resentment in Mexico about losing Texas and California. These feelings I have are like premonitions, from undercurrents that I'm tuned into as an artist. I may not know where the exact fact is located, and may refer to something as being everywhere, just look around and see for yourself, but I guess I have sensors, like subconscious feelings that I expose through art.
So this piece can have a lot of meanings. Depends on how deep you are willing to look. For me its about homeland security. Its about national identity. Its about the danger of losing our nationality, constitution to Mexico, a third world country.